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Greetings in the name of our Lord and
Savior Jesus Christ. If you are like me, you are probably tired of forking
out a lot of money for curriculum that is just
not worth it !!! I know that many of you have good ideas
and quality programs, but you need some new and
fresh ideas to use every once in a while. God has put on my
heart to write down some of the best ideas we have had in the past 15 years,
to pass them on to others. Jesus said, "Freely ye have received, freely
give", and being the God didn't charge us for the ideas He gave, we aren't
going to charge, but give to others what He has given to us.
We also suggest, and ask that you come
up with your own names in the place of the names you will find on the following
pages. This will allow for your Children's Church to be unique,
and fitted to your own personalities and characters. If every church had
a puppet with the same name, yet they all looked and sounded different,
this would seem strange to a child who might visit your church on one particular
If you have enjoyed this curriculum, please
feel free to duplicate it and give
it to others. This ministry's purpose is to get kids to Jesus, and to get
the words of Jesus to the kids. Also, if you have any ideas you would like
to share, please send them in, and we gladly will pass them on.
Peter says in II Peter 1:12-15 that he
continually put the people in remembrance of God's truths even though they
already knew them and were established in those truths, so that when he
would go on to be with the Lord, the people would have those truths firmly
and deeply rooted in their minds. In the same way, we in the Children's
Ministry need to continually put our kids in remembrance of Jesus and His
truths, even though they think they
know it all and are established in those truths, so that when they leave
our Sunday School, they will always have these truths firmly and deeply
rooted in them, and be able to stand strong in the faith of their Lord
and Savior Jesus Christ.
If you have found this curriculum helpful,
or if you haven't, please email us and let us know what you think. Your
opinion is not only desired, but needed. firstname.lastname@example.org
Now, God bless you as you minister unto
"Clunky" is a puppet who is always listening
to the memory verse and Bible story, but like Nicodemus when he talked
with Jesus about being born again, doesn't quite understand what is meant.
For example: In the book of Ephesians, it talks about having the "Shield
of Faith," so Clunk comes up carrying a cardboard shield with the words
"faith" written on it. With Clunk always goofing up, this gives you a good
opportunity to explain to him, and to the children, what exactly is meant
in that particular verse or story. We stress that these are only
skeletal ideas, and that you will need to take time on your own to figure
out exactly what you are going to say.
Clunky comes up and asks you if he can
go and play with his friends. You tell him that he can after church, but
Clunk says that his friends are not Christian and that it wouldnít be very
polite or Christianlike to make them wait. You still say no, so Clunky
gets mad and tells you, "I am sick and tired of being unappreciated around
here. I am always doing things for everybody else, but then when I want
to do something for myself I am always refused. I am sick and tired of
all this Christianity stuff Ö I am going to run away." Clunk leaves. He
comes back just seconds later, and asks you if he can borrow a couple of
bucks to get him by. You give it to him telling him that you donít want
him to leave, but Clunk takes the money and is again on his way to a new
and adventurous life. You call for one of the teachers in Childrenís Church,
and ask him if he would follow Clunky around off in the distance, and make
sure that he is OK. You give him a hat, fake nose and glasses, and he heads
out to follow Clunk.
Later in the service, the teacher calls
back and tells you, "I have followed Clunky to the movie theater where
he has met some of his friends and is flashing around the money you gave
him." (The teacher is actually behind the stage talking into a microphone.)
"Oh no, Iím going have to hang up, cause Clunk is coming this way." The
teacher calls right back just 30 seconds later and tells you, "It looks
like he is going into the movie theater to an R-rated movie." You thank
him for calling, and ask him to continue to follow Clunky and to call when
something else happens.
The teacher calls back and tells you, "I
have now followed Clunky into one of the local bars. I am standing outside
looking in the window at Clunky who is with his friends sitting at a table.
A big ugly bouncer is walking over to the table and is beginning to ask
questions of the kids. I canít tell what he is saying but he looks kind
of angry. The bouncer is grabbing Clunky by the throat and is shaking him
around. He is tipping Clunk upside down and dumping out the rest of his
money. He is now throwing him into the street. I will have to call you
back when I find out what Clunk is going to do next."
The teacher calls back again later in the
service and tells you, "I have followed Clunk to the grocery store, where
he is standing outside with his friends. It looks like he is pulling out
the lining of his pockets showing his friends that he is out of money.
Oh no, Clunky is coming this way, hold on a second." (We hear the teacher
as he answers Clunkyís questions.) "What, do I have a couple of bucks you
can borrow? Uhh, no, sorry. What, do you know me from somewhere? Uhh, I
donít think so buddy. Maybe you just know someone who looks like me. OK,
by." The teacher then begins to talk to you again. "Boy, that was close.
Well, Clunk has gone into the store with his friends, so I will have to
hang up now and call you when I get inside." The teacher calls you back
and tells you, "I am inside the store on one of the store phones by the
candy section, where Clunk and his friends are hanging around, acting very
suspicious. Wait a minute, Clunk is grabbing one of the bags of candy and
putting it inside his shirt. Now a security guard is grabbing him and pushing
him against the store shelves. He is spreading out Clunkyís legs and is
frisking him. He is pulling out the bag of candy that Clunky tried to steal.
Now he is pinning him to the ground and handcuffing him. He is now taking
Clunky away so I will have to call you back when I find out where he is
The teacher calls back and tells you, "I
am down at the police station where Clunk is standing in front of the sergeant
of police. I will put up the phone so you can listen and find out what
is happening." The teacher turns on a prerecorded tape of the discussion
between Clunky and the Police Sergeant. It goes something like this :
Police officer : "I ought to throw the
book at you."
Clunky : "Iíd like to see you try." (We
then hear the sound of a book hitting Clunk upside the head.)
Clunky : "Hey, that was a heavy book."
Police officer : "Where do you live?"
Clunky : "Well, I used to live at Church,
but I ran away."
Police officer : "Well, little guy, I
will give you two choices. Either go back to where you came from, or spend
the next six months in the slammer."
Clunky : "Nice knowing you Sarg." (We
then hear the sound of kissing and the Police Sergeant asking Clunk to
quit kissing his feet.)
The teacher then gets back on the phone
and tells you that he will have to leave to go follow Clunk to see where
Later in the service, Clunk comes up and
tells you that he knows you are busy, but asks if you have just one minute
to talk to him. He tells you that he is really sorry for what he has done.
He tells you that he realizes that he isnít worthy to be a part of the
childrenís church staff any more, but that if you would have him, he would
love to just hang around and clean the toilets. You tell him that he never
wanted him to leave in the first place and welcome him with open arms giving
him a hug. While you are talking to Clunk, the teacher comes in taking
off his fake nose and glasses. When Clunk leaves, he looks over at the
teacher and asks, "Have I seen you any place? Nahh." Clunk then leaves.
SOME SOW, SOME WATER ... (1:9)
Clunky comes up dressed as Clunk Wayne,
nervous about an opportunity to witness to a new kid in school. He tells
you that he has been really nice to him, and has hinted a little about
Jesus telling him that he is a Christian and stuff like that, but that
he is kind of scared to really witness to him. Clunk says, "You may not
believe this, but though I look suave, smooth, sophisticated, handsome,
and intelligent, sometimes I actually say some stupid things." You act
surprised, and Clunk tells you that it is true. You then reassure him and
tell him that he will do a good job. Clunk leaves encouraged and excited
to go witness to kid.
Later in the service, some little kid puppet
(the one Clunk was going to witness to) comes up and asks if this is thechurch
Clunky goes to. You tell him yes, and then he tells you that he just moved
in to town, and that Clunk has been really nice and a really good friend
to him and that this morning he tried to witness to him and tell him about
God, but got all mixed up and quit and ran away, and now he wants to know
if Clunk is here so he can tell him more about this Jesus. You tell him
that Clunk hasn't come back yet, but that you can help him if he wishes.
He says OK and so you finish telling him what he needs to hear and then
him if he would like to pray and accept Jesus as his Lord and Savior. The
puppet says yes, and you lead him into a little sinner's prayer. The puppet
is excited and decides to leave to go tell his parents, and asks you if
you would thank Clunky for him.
Later in the service, we hear Clunk moping
in the background. You come up and ask Clunk what he is moping about. Clunk
tells you that he did what you told him and went to go witness to that
kid, but got all confused and that he messed it all up telling the kid
that Jesus died on his heart, and that if he would believe with his mouth
and confess with his brain, that Jesus would come and rise again in his
cross, and now that kid probably thinks he is a dork, and will never become
a Christian. You tell Clunk that the boy came by the church looking for
Clunk and asking more questions about Jesus, so you told him and he accepted
the Lord. Instead of being happy, Clunk is even more disappointed because
you led him to the Lord and Clunk was just a big nothing. You explain to
Clunk that the Bible says that some sow, some water and some reap the harvest.
Clunk asks what does his grandpa's farm have to do with this, and you explain
that even though you were the one who reaped the harvest and got to lead
the boy to the Lord, it was Clunky who first sowed the seed and then watered
it allowing the boy to become interested, and that if it wasn't for Clunk
the boy would have never come to you. Clunk realizes what you are saying
and decides to leave to go and, "sow some more seeds, and preach the earth
to the whole gospel."
Clunky and Simon RePeter are talking behind
the stage. You come up front and turn the blinds slightly, so that we can
see Clunk and Simon and listen to what they are saying. Clunk tells Simon
to watch and make sure the coast is clear while he sneaks two of the candy
bars from the back. Simon is not sure he wants to do this, but Clunk talks
him into it. You hide in the corner, while Simon comes to the window and
looks around. Clunk takes the candy bars, then runs by telling Simon that
he has them and to come on. The two of them leave to divide the candy bars.
You tell the kids that you will have to have a little talk with the two
boys later on.
Simon comes up later in the service and
calls for you. He tells you what they did, and gives back the candy bar
saying that he is sorry and won't ever do it again. You thank Simon for
his honesty and for repenting; he leaves, and you then call for Clunky
to come up. Clunk comes and you ask him if there is anything that he would
like to tell you, and Clunk says no. You ask him if he is sure there isnít
anything he would like to get off his chest. Clunk looks down at his chest
and still says no. You then ask him about the candy bars. Clunk plays innocent,
acting like he doesnít know what you are talking about, and you tell him
that you overheard him earlier, and know for a fact that he took them,
and that now he is going to have to be punished. Clunk comes clean and
admits to stealing the candy bar, and then rats on Simon RePeter. You tell
him that Simon repented for what he had done, and has already confessed
and given back the candy bar, and that he is forgiven. Clunk then asks
what the punishment is, and you tell him that you were going to take both
of them out for ice cream after church, but that now you are only going
to take out Simon. Clunk then begins to apologize, really laying it on
thick, but you tell him that it won't work, because he is only sorry that
he got caught, not because he did something bad. You then tell Clunk that
you want him to go back and think about what he has done.
Clunky comes up with a home made sock puppet,
talking to him (When Clunk does his puppet, make it look like Clunky is
a bad puppeteer, don't let the puppet's words match its mouth's movements.
Also, let Clunk's mouth move a little, making it appear he is actually
the one doing the puppet). Clunk is mad at Bully for always picking on
him, and tells his sock puppet that he is going to start a rumor about
Bully. Clunk puts away his puppet and turns looking for someone to spread
the rumor to. He calls for Simon RePeter, who comes up, and Clunk begins
to tell him his rumor about Bully, "While I was helping a little old lady
cross the street over by the hospital, I saw Bully dressed like a nerd
and picking his nose." He then tells Simon not to tell anyone, knowing
that Simon will, and then tells him, "And remember, you didn't hear it
from me." Both puppets leave.
Simon RePeter comes up later in the service
looking for someone to tell the rumor to, when Edword comes up. Simon tells
Edword that he heard a rumor, and wants to know if he wants to hear it.
He then tells Edword, "While Clunky was helping some old lady to the hospital
because she fell down I guess, he saw Bully standing in the corner dressed
like a nerd and picking his nose." Edword is amazed, and Simon tells him
not to tell anyone that he heard it from him. Simon leaves, and Edword
looks for someone he can tell the rumor to, when Mr. Sin comes up. Edword
tells him, "Did you hear, while Clunky was picking his nose on the corner,
he saw an old lady fall down, so he took her to the hospital, where he
saw Bully dressed like a nerd." He too tells Mr. Sin not to tell that he
heard it from him. Both puppets leave.
Mr. Sin comes back up later in the service
looking for someone to tell the rumor to. You come up and ask him what
he is doing, and Mr. Sin asks you if you heard about Clunky. You say no,
so he tells you, "Clunky was picking his nose when he fell down, jamming
in his finger. Well, some old lady came by and saw it, so she took him
to the hospital, where they made him wear nerd hospital clothes, and was
roommate with Bully." Mr. Sin leaves telling you not to tell that you heard
it from him. You call for Clunky because you are worried that he had to
go to the hospital. Clunky comes up asking what is wrong, and you tell
him that you were just going to ask the same question, that you heard that
he was in the hospital. Clunk asks what in the world you are talking about,
and you tell him that you just heard that he fell down and jammed his finger
in his nose, and had to have some old lady take him to the hospital, where
they made him wear nerdy clothes and be roommates with Bully. Clunk says,
"That's not how I started that rumor." You then explain to Clunk that that
is the way rumors work. People tend to hear only part of it, and then fill
in the rest as they think best, and in this case it backfired. Clunk apologizes,
and vows never to start another rumor again, at least with Simon RePeter.
You look at Clunk angrily, and he says, "OK, never again to anyone." Clunk
then leaves to try to find out who all heard this rumor and straighten
this whole mess out.
JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY (3:3)
Clunk comes up and asks you if there are
any jobs that need to be done around the church. You tell him yes, but
that you don't have any money to pay him for them. Clunk tells you that
he doesn't want any money, and you jokingly hit your ears and ask him to
repeat that last line he just said, because you thought he said he didn't
want any money. Clunk says, "Har dee har har" and tells you that he doesn't,
and asks what are the jobs. You tell him that the back of the puppet stage
is a mess, and he could help straighten up. Clunk says, "No problem" and
then leaves to go clean. We then see papers and stuff being thrown around
as Clunk is busy cleaning.
Later in the service, one of the teachers
is walking behind the puppet stage and Clunk runs over to help her across.
She asks what he is doing, and Clunk tells her, he just wants to help her
so that she doesn't trip over anything and fall and hurt herself. She says,
"Why, thank you, Clunky" and continues on her way, as Clunk leaves to clean.
Later Clunk comes back up and tells you
that the back of the puppet stage is all clean, and then asks if there
are any other jobs that need to be done. You tell him that the bathrooms
really need to be cleaned, but that you know he would never do that. Clunk
looks at you and says, "Oh no, that would be just perfect" and then leaves
to go clean the bathrooms.
Later Clunky comes up dressed with rubber
gloves, plastic shower cap, and carrying a toilet plunger, and you ask
him why in the world he is doing all of this. He says, "You probably won't
believe this, but sometimes I do some bad things." You act surprised. Clunk
continues to tell you that he came to the realization that he is not always
the best behaved puppet, granted cute, adorable, kind, ruggedly handsome
... (you interrupt him) ... but not always well behaved, and he began to
think about going to heaven and stuff, and realized that he probably hasn't
done enough good deeds to make it to heaven, so he is trying to do some
things now, like clean the church toilets, shine people's shoes, and help
little old ladies across the stage (the teacher that Clunk helped yells
out, "Who are you calling old?") so that God will be happy with him and
let him in. You explain to Clunky that all of these things that he is doing
are good and nice and that you should do them, but that they are not what
will get him into heaven. Clunk asks, "Are you telling me cleaning toilets
won't get me into heaven?" You tell him no, and Clunk then asks, "If cleaning
toilets won't get me into heaven, then what in the world will?" You explain
to Clunk that the only way into heaven is through Jesus, and accepting
Jesus as your Lord and Savior. Clunk says he understands and leaves to
go do some more good works. You tell him again, "Clunk, I told you, you
donít have to do those things to get to heaven." And Clunk tells you he
knows, he just wants to do it anyway. Clunky leaves.
RUNNING THE RACE TO WIN (3:6)
Clunky comes up all dressed up, and you
ask him where he is going. He says he is going to the State Puppet Tiddily
Winks Championships. You ask him where he got the tickets, and Clunk tells
you he is not going to watch, but to play. You tell him you didn't know
he was on the team, that you never saw him go to practice, and Clunk says
he doesn't need to practice, that he is a natural, the Michael Jordan of
Tiddily Winks. You tell him that even Michael Jordan practices, but Clunk
says that he is gifted by God and that practice would just goof it up.
You tell him that yes, God does give talents, but that we still need to
practice. Clunk excuses himself, and says he has to go.
Later in the service, you turn on the radio
to find out the score of the Tiddily winks match (a tape recorder with
a prerecorded news announcement on it). "'... And now for the sports with
Al'. 'Thank you Roger. For local sports, the Wickenburg Winkers defeated
the (your city name) Puppets in the State Tiddily Winks Championships 100
to three, I repeat, the Wickenburg Winkers defeated the (your city name)
Puppets in the State Tiddily Winks Championships 100 to three. It seems
that the (your city name) star Clunko just couldn't make a tittle or a
wink. Now for local traffic information, we take you back to Roger in the
helicopter.'" You turn off the radio and look at the kids, and say something
about how Clunk is probably pretty disappointed.
A couple of minutes later, Clunk comes
back up very disappointed. You ask him about the game, acting like you
don't know the results, and Clunk tells you that he did great, but that
the rest of his team blew it for them. You look at him and sternly say,
"Clunky", and Clunk comes clean and tells you that he just couldn't do
anything, "Every wink went wide, and every tittle died", and that he has
learned his lesson about practicing. You can tell Clunk that you will give
him some pointers if he would like, and Clunk asks if you play Tiddily
Winks. You tell him sure, and then go back with Clunk as he leaves to go
and begin practicing for next year's Championships.
BEING A DOER OF THE WORD (3:9)
You come up and tell the kids that you
had Clunky and Simon do something special for you (like wash your car,
mow the lawn ... etc.), and that you told them you would buy each of them
a model airplane to build for their help. You then call the two of them
up. Clunk and Simon come up, and you thank them for the good job they did
for you, and that you have the models for them. Clunk and Simon are so
excited, they want to hurry up and start to build. You tell them that the
directions are in the box, and to make sure to read them carefully and
take their time, and that they should turn out really swell. You leave
with the two boys to help them set up a table for them to build their models
Simon comes back up excited about the good
job he did on making his model, and then proudly shows you, and you show
the kids. He tells you that he followed the directions very carefully,
and that it turned out to be the coolest model he has ever built, and thanks
you again for it. Simon leaves so that he can show it to his mommy, and
you begin to wonder how Clunk did on his model, so you call him up. Clunk
comes up mad at the world. You ask him what is the matter, and he tells
you that first of all the model that he got was stupid and must have been
a reject from the factory because it wouldn't fit, and looks totally dumb.
You ask Clunk if he followed the instructions, and he tells you kind of.
Clunk then goes to get his model that is completely done backwards, and
again tells you that his model was a reject. You tell Clunk that the two
models that you bought were identical, and that the problem was not in
the model, but in the builder, that he needed to follow the instructions,
and that everything would have worked out fine. You both leave with Clunk
swearing that the next time he gets a model, he will follow the instructions.
HEARING GOD'S VOICE (4:10)
Clunky comes up confused and panicked because
he has a decision to make and he doesn't know what to do. He frantically
tells you that he has joined the football team as the star bench warmer
and that he has daily practices, but that now his friend Barney has asked
him if he wants to go to Disney World with him, which means he would have
to miss three days of practice. He explains that Barney's mom and dad said
he could bring some friends with him, and so now Clunk doesn't know what
to do, but being that he is so busy running around and panicking, he cannot
listen to you as you try and talk to him and give him some advice. Clunk
leaves. (Clunky doesnít hear.)
Clunk comes back up later in the service
again panicked, and you grab him and make him look you in the eyes, and
give him your advice. You tell him that it would be really neat to go to
Disney World, Clunk interrupts and says, "Good advice, I'll go to Disney
World" but you stop him and continue and try to explain that it would be
neat, but that he gave his commitment to the football coach and rest of
the team that he would be there for practice and therefore he must choose
the football practice. Clunk ignores the second part of your advice, telling
you that he may never get another chance to go to Disney World for free,
and decides to go there. Clunky leaves. (Clunk hears but doesnít do.)
Clunk comes back up later in the service,
looking for you for advice after messing everything up. He tells you that
he went and told his coach that he had to go to his grandma's funeral,
who happened to die at Disney World, and the coach didn't believe him and
said that if he decides to go to Disney World and misses practice, then
he is off the team. So Clunk quit and went home only to get a call from
his friend Barney who told him that his mom and dad said he could only
bring one friend so he chose to bring Simon RePeter and he hopes that Clunk
would understand. Now that Clunk has neither, he asks for your advice once
again, which is to go and apologize to the coach and ask him for his position
back. You make Clunk feel better by telling him that not just anybody can
be a good bench warmer, and that his coach will probably take him back.
Clunk tells you that that is probably true, and being that he has way more
experience in bench warming than all of the rest of the guys on the team
put together, his coach should let him back on the team. Clunk leaves to
go talk to the coach. (Clunk hears and does.)
READING THE BIBLE (4:9)
Clunky comes out and asks you what you
are talking about in Children's Church this morning. You tell him, "Reading
the Bible", and then he tells you, "Good, not anything important. So can
I go to Billy McKilihutty's house?" You ask him what he means by not important,
and Clunk tells you that it is important for other kids to hear, but that
he has already read his Bible once, and that is good enough for him, beings
that he has got a photogenic memory. You tell him that just because he
has read his Bible once doesn't mean that he knows and remembers everything,
"It is just like walking around your house with a bag over your head, you
run into things." Clunk tells you that he could walk around his house with
a bag on his head and not run into anything. You ask him if he wants to
do a test and put a paper sack over his head so he cannot see, and find
out just how well he does by memory. Clunk agrees to the test, and you
put a paper bag over his head, and he leaves to prove to you that he knows
where he is going and can do it. As Clunk leaves he runs into the wall.
He asks you to point him in the right direction and then he will be fine
after that. Clunk now slowly walks off.
Later in the service, someone comes up
on stage to take the offering, and he begins to eat a banana. When he is
done, he throws the peel behind the puppet stage and walks away. A few
seconds later, Clunk walks out whistling, saying how easy it is, and doesn't
see the banana peel (the bag is still on his head) and slips and falls.
Clunk gets up and leaves asking where that banana peel came from. Someone
mean-looking then comes out front and asks the kids if they have seen a
stupid looking short little blue guy. He tells them that Clunk sat on his
Twinkies during lunch time at school, and he is here now to beat him up
for it. He walks back behind stage, and stands in the puppet stage when
Clunk walks up and runs into him. Clunk not knowing who it is says, "Watch
it, you big galump, can't you see that I can't see where I am going? Boy
some people are soo ..." While Clunk is talking, the person pulls off his
paper bag and Clunk seeing who it is turns and runs away. The mean person
Later in the service, Clunk walks in with
no shirt on, holding a back brush and rubber ducky, thinking that the room
he is in is the bathroom. He is looking around for the bathtub when he
notices the kids giggling. Clunk pulls off the sack to realize he has made
a wrong turn and runs out embarrassed.
You come up and call for Clunk and ask
him how he did with the bag over his head. Clunk tells you that at times
he did good, but admits that at other times he did bad, because things
had moved and he couldn't see. Clunk comes to the realization that even
though he has read his Bible once before, he still needs to continue to
read it more. Clunk then tells you that he is not a very good reader, and
asks if you would come back and read to him. You say yes and tell him that
you will meet him after church to read to him.
LOVE, FRIENDS ...
Clunk comes up looking for Simon RePeter.
Simon comes up, and Clunk asks him if he could borrow his new game because
he is going over to someone's house and wants to use it. Simon says that
he would let him use it, but that Pastor Dan has already asked him if he
could borrow it for the day. Clunk begins to beg, but to no avail, even
telling Simon that he thought that they were bestest friends. Simon says
they are, but that he has already promised Pastor Dan, and he can't go
back on his word. Clunk gets mad and tells Simon that their friendship
is over, and not to ever talk to him again. Simon tries to talk to him,
but Clunk is mean and ignores him, saying to the kids, "Do you hear someone
talking to me?" Simon leaves and Clunk yells after him, "See you never,
ex-bestest friend." Clunk also leaves.
Clunky comes up later in the service and
introduces to the kids a new kid named Ronald that goes to his school.
Ronald says, "So you are the dumb, I mean Christian friends that Clanko
has been talking about." Clunk tells him his name is "Clunky". Ronald says
"Yah, whatever." Clunk tells the kids that he used to be really mean to
him, but that now he is really ahh kind of nice, and that they are new
bestest buds, and that Ronald has a Nintendo with all of the latest games
that he has invited Clunky to play with. Ronald tells Clunk that he has
to go home before his mean old cranky grouchy mom starts hollering at him,
and then asks Clunk if he has five dollars he can borrow. Clunk thinks
about it, then says "Five dollars?" Ronald tells him that if he can't lend
him five dollars, then he'll just have to find a new bestest bud to help
him play his new games with (he then begins to name some of the games.)
Clunk says OK, and they leave to go get the five dollars. Clunk comes back
up and asks you what you think about his new friend. You tell Clunk that
you are not sure, but that something seems kind of fishy about him. Clunk
tells you that he used to be mean to him and beat him up after school,
but that now he is really, well kind of ... he's OK. You tell Clunk that
you are still not sure about him, and that Clunk needs to watch out for
himself, especially with him borrowing that five dollars. Clunk tells you
that it's OK, that he is sure he will pay him back. Clunk tells you that
he has to go and give his new bestest bud a call on the phone.
(We hear Clunk in behind the stage calling
up Ronald, but only getting a answering machine, so Clunk leaves a message
and tells Ronald to call him back.)
Later in the service the telephone rings
and you answer it. It is Ronald, and he is calling for Clunk. You call
for Clunk, and tell him that there is a telephone call for him from Ronald.
You hold the phone up to Clunky's ear as we hear Ronald telling Clunk not
to ever call his house again, or for that matter never come near him again,
because he now has a new bestest friend and doesn't need Clunk anymore.
Clunk asks him about the five dollars he owes him, and Ronald just calls
him a sucker for giving it to him and hangs up. Clunk is distraught and
you begin to comfort him and tell him that friends like Ronald are really
not friends at all, that true friends are people you can count on and who
will do things with and for you just because they are your friend. Clunk
looks at you and says "You mean like Simon." You tell him yes, and Clunk
tells you that he is going to leave to go find Simon and make up and then
take him out for an ice cream cone. Clunk then asks you if he can borrow
a buck, because he gave all his money his to Ronald. You tell him to go
find Simon, and that you will treat the both of them to ice cream after
church. Clunk leaves.
We hear a bully puppet as he is talking
to Clunk, Simon RePeter, and Birtha in the background, calling them names
and saying how stupid they are for going to church and believing in this
stupid God of theirs. He gets into an argument with them, and calls Birtha
ugly, and Birtha asks Clunk if he is going to let this big bully say all
of these things. Clunk seeing the size of the bully says yes. The bully
says more about how stupid their God is, and Birtha asks Clunk if he is
going to let him say those things. Clunk, scared, again says yes. The bully
spits on them and chases them all away and comes up to the front. He asks
the kids what this place is (they should respond by telling him it is their
children's church), and the bully begins to call all of the kids names
as well. He then decides to leave and slips on a banana peel, falling and
hurting himself, not able to get up.
Later in the service, Clunk comes up and
trips over the bully. The bully asks him for help, but Clunky gets up and
begins to laugh at him, and make fun of him and calls him names. He then
tells him that he is going to spit on him and see how he likes it, but
when Clunk spits, he hits his own shoe, and says, "Rats, I spit on my own
shoe, but if I would have hit you, how would you have liked it?" Clunk
tells the bully that he is not so tough when he is laying on the ground
hurt, but is scared away when the bully threatens him.
Later in the service, Birtha sees him and
also makes fun of him, even kicking him a couple of times while he is down.
Birtha leaves now feeling satisfied, and justified getting back at him.
Finally Simon RePeter comes up and sees
him. The bully asks him if he is going to call him names and get back at
him. Simon says no, that he wouldn't do that cause he is a Christian. The
bully asks Simon if he is going to kick him also. Simon again says no,
he wouldn't do that, he is a Christian. The bully asks, "Then what are
you going to do?" Simon tells him that first he is going to help him up,
and then he will help him home. Simon helps him up and then asks the bully
where he lives. The bully tells him that he is visiting his grandma. Simon
then begins to help him off stage, with the bully telling Simon that he
is a really cool guy and that he would like to hear more about this Christian
LIVING FOR GOD
Clunk comes up excited, telling you that
they have been learning about different jobs in school, and he says that
he is going to become something important when he grows up. You ask him
what it is he would like to be, and he tells you a professional basketball
player. He tells you that he will become the next Michael Jordan, and that
thousands, maybe even millions of fans will flock to watch him play, and
that they will probably invent a name for his shot called the "Clunk Dunk".
Clunk leaves to call the Phoenix Suns, and to go sign up.
Clunky comes back later in the service
discouraged. He tells you that he talked to the Suns' recruiting agent
on the phone and the agent told him that he was much too short to play
basketball, but that they did have an opening to work in the arena for
someone to clean the toilets in the visitors team locker rooms. You encourage
Clunk, telling him that he just needs to look for another career. Clunk
gets excited again, and decides that he will become something really important,
like maybe an astronaut. Clunk says that people have even told him they
thought he was somewhere in outerspace. Clunk leaves calling himself "Sean
Luke PcClunk" singing the Star Trek theme song, and quoting the Star Trek
monologue, "Space, the final frontier..." Clunk leaves.
Again Clunk comes back discouraged. In
the first place, he tells you that he is afraid of heights which makes
going to the moon out of the question, and secondly, they put him in a
machine that spun around in circles and he threw up all over his instructor,
so they threw him out. Again you encourage him, and again Clunk gets excited
and decides he will become something really, really important like a brain
surgeon, that way he could save peopleís lives. Clunk leaves.
Once more Clunk comes back discouraged.
He tells you that he found out it takes twelve years of college, followed
by twelve years of interning in a hospital, besides the twelve years of
normal school, and at that rate Clunk, now in his fourth year of kindergarten,
will be 102 before he ever gets started. You tell him that it isn't the
career he takes on when he gets older that makes him important, but the
kind of life that he lives, that being a Christian at whatever job he gets
is the important thing. That being a super athlete without Jesus is meaningless,
and that saving people's lives is important, but telling them about Jesus
and really saving their lives is even more important. Clunk realizes that
you are right, and decides to go call up the Phoenix Suns again, and see
if he can get that job at cleaning the toilets and witness to people, and
maybe get a couple of autographs.
We hear Clunky yelling and then see clothes
and things being thrown around back behind the stage. Teacher A comes up
and asks Clunky to come up, and then asks him what he is doing and what
is wrong. Clunk tells him to just keep his big nose out of his business,
and to leave him alone. Teacher A tries to talk to him, but again Clunk
yells at him and tells him to just leave him alone, and walks out.
Later in the service we hear Clunk yelling
again, and then hear Simon RePeter trying to talk to him (We just hear
it, we don't actually see it. While this is going on, teacher B can walk
up front, look at the kids and just shrug his shoulders.) Clunk tells Simon
to just leave him alone. Simon tells him that he is his friend, and that
if he needs something, he will help. Clunk tells him if he doesn't leave
him alone he is going to punch him in the nose. Simon persists, and we
hear the sound of Clunk hitting him, and then Simon running off crying.
We then hear Edword coming over and asking Clunky why he hit Simon. Clunk
tells him to leave him alone, or he is going to hit him too. Edword persists,
and we hear as Clunky hits him also. We hear Edword running off crying.
We next hear Mr. Sin come up to Clunk and tell him that what he did was
really cool, and that he liked watching the whole thing. Clunk tells him
that if he liked watching it, then he should really enjoy participating
in it, and hits him too. Finally we hear Big Birtha come up to Clunk and
ask what is the matter. Clunk tells her, "What's it to you, you big ugly
stupid girl?" We hear Birtha say, "Who are you calling a stupid girl?"
and then the sound of someone getting hit. Birtha walks up on stage, looks
back at where Clunky is and says, "Call me ugly and stupid, will you" and
then walks off. Teacher B goes to the stage, looks over and ask, "Clunk,
are you OK?" Clunk gets up, and walks up on stage. Teacher B asks him what
is the matter, and again Clunk just begins to yell at him, and to tell
him to just leave him alone. Clunk then looks at the kids and says, "Everybody
just leave me alone." Clunk walks off.
Later in the Service, teacher C comes up
front, and tells the kids that he just remembered that he promised Clunky
he would take him out for ice cream, but he forgot. Teacher C has a gift
with him (like a squirt gun) and tells the kids that he got this for Clunk,
to make up for forgetting. Teacher C calls for Clunk, who refuses to come
up. Teacher C then calls one more time telling him that if he doesn't come
up, he will get a spanking. Clunk comes up, but before Teacher C can say
anything, Clunk blows up and begins to yell at him, telling him to just
leave him alone. Teacher C asks Clunk what this is all about, and Clunk
says, "What's this all about? What's this all about? I forgot, what is
this all about? Oh yeah, now I remember, I will tell you what this is all
about mister, forget to take me to the ice cream parlor." Teacher C then
tells Clunky that he was wrong forgetting to take Clunk to the ice cream
parlor, that he had no excuses, but that it did not give Clunky the right
to yell at him or at anyone else. Teacher C shows Clunky the present he
got him, and then tells him that he was going to give it to Clunk because
he had forgotten, but that now he is not going to, unless Clunky goes back
and begins to apologize to all the people he has been yelling at and hitting.
He explains to Clunk that he allowed himself to become unforgiving and
consequently very bitter. Clunk begins to understand, and apologizes to
teacher C for yelling at him and for not forgiving him and being understanding.
Teacher C accepts the apology and tells Clunk to go and apologize to everyone
else. Clunk apologizes to Teachers A and B and to the kids, and then leaves
to go find Simon, Edword, Mr. Sin and Birtha.
Birtha comes up looking for Clunk. Clunk
comes up, and they begin to talk about the trip to the water park they
are going on tomorrow. Birtha tells Clunk that she has her ten dollars
and asks Clunk if he has his. Clunk tells her no, but that he will get
it in time for the trip. Birtha tells him he had better hurry, because
they are leaving tomorrow morning. Birtha then leaves to go get ready for
Clunk looks down and asks for Pastor Dan
to come up (Pastor Dan is the person who does the Clunky puppet). Clunk
calls for him three times when Pastor Dan finally comes up and asks what
he wants. Clunk says money and Pastor Dan goes back down saying, "Bye Clunk."
Clunk calls him back up. Pastor Dan asks him how much he needs, Clunk says
ten dollars and Pastor Dan leaves again saying, "Bye Clunk." Clunk calls
him back up, and explains that he needs ten dollars to go to the water
park, he has six dollars now and only needs four more dollars to go. Pastor
Dan says four dollars. Clunk says yes, and that he is even willing to work
to earn it. Pastor Dan hits his ears and asks, "I'm sorry Clunk, I didn't
hear you quite right, what did you say?" Clunk says, "Hardy har har. I
am willing to work for the money, no matter what it is I have to do." Pastor
Dan tells him that the boys bathroom needs to be cleaned. Clunk asks if
there are any other jobs. Pastor Dan says no, but that if he will clean
the bathroom, he will give him two dollars. Clunk says, "Only two bucks?"
Pastor Dan says, "Only two bucks." Clunk says thanks a lot and leaves singing,
"Hi ho hi ho, off to clean the toidy I go."
Clunk comes up later in the service wearing
rubber gloves, shower cap, a clothes pin in his nose, and holding a plunger,
and looks down asking for Pastor Dan. After the second time. Pastor Dan
says, "Clunk, you are not supposed to talk to me." Clunk asks why, and
Pastor Dan tells him that the kids are not supposed to know he is down
there. Clunk says, "I think they know that already." Clunk tells him he
needs more money, and Pastor Dan tells him forget it, go mooch off of someone
else. Clunk calls for one of the other teachers and asks her if there are
any jobs he can do to get the money. She tells him that he can clean the
girls restroom for two dollars. Clunk tells her that he can't clean the
girls bathroom because he not allowed in, he is a boy. She tells him that
she will go with him to make sure that no one is in there. Clunk leaves
to go clean.
Birtha comes up mad and sad. Clunk comes
up and asks what is wrong. Birtha tells him that she put her purse down
for just one minute, and someone has stolen it and now she doesn't have
the money to go to the water park. Clunk tells her that she can try to
earn it like he did. She tells him that she has to go to her aunt's house
and doesn't have time. Clunk, after thinking and talking to himself about
it, decides to give Birtha his ten dollars. Birtha asks why, and Clunky
tells her that he knows how he would feel if he were in her place, and
besides, she is his friend. Birtha begins to chase him around the puppet
stage, then finally catch him, tackle, and kiss him. Birtha gets up and
leaves. Clunk gets up spitting. Pastor Dan says, "Psst". Clunk looks around.
Pastor Dan says louder, "Psssst." Clunk looks at the kids and says, "Did
you hear a psst?" Pastor Dan says, "Clunk, it is me down here." Clunk says,
(mouth closed) "Pastor Dan, I am not supposed to talk to you while you
are down there." Pastor Dan comes up and tells Clunk that it is OK for
this one time. He then tells Clunk that he was impressed at what he did,
and is going to do something special for him. "Being that you gave Birtha
your ten dollars, I am going to buy you a big soda at the water park."
Clunk says, "Thanks a lot Pastor Dan. I don't have ten dollars any more,
and now I can't go." Pastor Dan tells him, "I know, that is why I am going
to pay for your way in also." Clunk tells Pastor Dan thanks and begins
to chase him around the puppet stage, then catch, tackle, and kiss him.
From behind the stage we hear Pastor Dan spitting and saying, "Thanks Clunk."
Clunky comes up somewhat sad, and teacher
A comes up and asks him what is the matter. Clunk says he's just kind of
blue, and then asks teacher A if he could possibly go to the ice cream
parlor with him and talk. Teacher A tells Clunk that he would love to,
but that he canít and gives Clunk a buck telling him to buy himself a double
dipper ice cream cone, and to have a good time. Teacher A leaves, and so
does Clunk, still sad.
Clunk comes up later in the service still
sad, and teacher B asks him what is the matter. Clunk tells her the same
thing and asks if she would be willing to go to the ice cream parlor with
him and just talk a little while. Teacher B also tells him that she would
love to, really she would, but that she has somewhere to go after church,
and also gives Clunk a buck telling him to buy himself a chocolate malt
and to have a really good time. Teacher B pats Clunk on the back and then
leaves. Clunk also leaves, still sad.
Clunk comes up again in the service still
sad, and teacher C asks him what is the matter. Clunk tells him the same
thing and asks if he would be willing to go to the ice cream parlor with
him and just talk a little while. Teacher C also tells him that he would
love to, really truly he would, but that he has to meet someone already
after church, and gives Clunk a buck and tells him to buy himself an ice
cream cone and to have a really good time. Clunk tells him that he doesn't
need his buck, so teacher C gives him five dollars and tells him to buy
himself a banana split and to have a really great time. Teacher C leaves
and so does Clunk.
Clunk comes up for the last time with his
little suit case packed, ready to leave and find another church. One of
the kids from your children's church comes up and asks him where he is
going, and Clunk tells her. The girl tells Clunky that she doesn't have
any money on her, but if it is OK with him, she would love to go to the
ice cream parlor with him to talk. She tells him that she can get a glass
of water and that they could maybe get some of the other kids to go also.
Clunk asks her if she would really do that and she says yes. Clunk tells
her that he will even buy her a double scoop ice cream cone, because he
has eight dollars. The girl tells him that would be great, and then tells
him to meet her after church. The girl leaves and so does Clunky now happy.
PROOF THAT JESUS ROSE AGAIN (3:10)
(Goes with Joshua
skit # 29)
(You will need an old, already broken camera)
You come up with a camera and explain to
the kids that one of the puppets, Birtha, asked you if she could borrow
your camera for a school project. You call for Birtha, give her the camera,
and tell her that when she is done with it to just leave it back behind
the stage next to your Bible. She thanks you for the use of the camera,
and then leaves.
Later in the service, Clunk comes up with
the camera telling the kids that he found it back in the back and he wonders
whose it is. While Clunk is playing with it, he accidentally drops it,
causing it to break. Clunk begins to panic and tells the kids to promise
not to tell that it was his fault. Clunk leaves to go take his fingerprints
off of it and to put the it back.
Moments later, you find the camera broken
and call for Birtha. She comes up and you ask her what happened to your
camera. She says she doesn't know, that she left it right where you told
her to put it, and that it was in good shape when she left it. You ask
her, "Well if you didn't break it, then who did?" You both look at each
other for a second and then say, "Clunky". You turn to the kids and ask
them if they know anything about the camera, and they should tell you that
Clunk broke it. You call for Clunk who comes up acting very innocent. You
tell him about the camera, and then ask him if he knows anything about
it. Clunk begins a long line of lies to prove that he didnít do it, like
he just got to church two minutes ago, but you remind him that you are
the one that gave him the ride to church one hour ago. Clunk tells you
that he was in the back room playing, and you tell him that the back room
is locked. Clunk tells you he now remembers that he was playing with Simon
RePeter, but you tell him that Simon is on vacation in Cucamonga. Clunk
tries one more lie, but you interrupt him, and tell him that you do not
want to hear his lies and then tell him that if he will confess to doing
it you will forgive him, but that if he doesn't then you will be forced
to have to give him a spanking and sell his tricycle to pay for a new camera.
Clunk goes over his two options with you, and Birtha adds that she will
also be forced to beat him up if he doesn't confess. Clunk comes clean
and tells exactly what happened, saying that it was an accident, and that
he is sorry. You tell him you kind of figured it was an accident, and that
is why you are going to forgive him. You all leave.
(Message : If the disciples were telling
a lie, that Jesus didn't rise from the dead, but they stole his body like
the Jews said they did, then they too would have confessed rather than
being put to death for believing in Jesus.)
Clunky comes up and asks the kids where
Pastor Dan is. The kids tell him behind the stage, and Clunk looks down
and asks Pastor Dan if he can ask him a question. Pastor Dan says, "No."
Clunk tells him that he just wants to talk to him about a new game and
Pastor Dan says, "No." Clunk tells him that it is a cool game and Pastor
Dan says, "No." Clunk even tells him it is an educational game and it has
a Christian theme to it and Pastor Dan says, "No." Clunk asks him if all
he is going to say is no and Pastor Dan says, "No." Clunk then asks if
he is even listening to anything he is saying and Pastor Dan says, "No."
Clunk says, "Don't you think that you are the prettiest children's pastor
in the world and Pastor Dan says, "No." Clunk then asks Pastor Dan where
he is crawling off to, and Pastor Dan tells him to get away from him so
he doesn't have to listen to him whine about not getting the game. Clunk
yells at him as he is crawling away, "I don't need this abuse. There are
a lot of churches who would love to have a puppet like me, well, maybe,
not a lot, but I bet there are a couple." Clunk then leaves.
Later in the service, Clunk comes back
up with his coat on and his suit case packed, and one of the teachers comes
up and asks him where he is going. Clunk tells him, "I am leaving to find
a church where the children's pastor will love me and buy me cool toys,
unlike some children's pastors I know." (He yells this back behind the
stage at Pastor Dan.) The teacher asks Clunky if he thinks he is being
fair about all of this, and Clunk says yes, that he is taken for granted
and he is tired of always being left out, and that he knows a lot of other
puppets at other churches who are treated like kings. The teacher then
begins to talk about a lot of things that Clunky has, like his brand new
tricycle. Clunk tells him that the only reason he got that is because he
had to rake all the leaves, and that was a lot of hard work, especially
when he fell out of the tree three times. The teacher then tells Clunk
that he knows for a fact Pastor Dan was going to buy himself a new pair
of jeans, but decided he could wear his old pair for a couple more months
so that he could buy Clunk that trike. Clunk tells the teacher he didn't
know that. The teacher then asks Clunk about the party he had with his
puppet friends. Clunk tells him that he deserved that, and the teacher
tells Clunk that again he knows for a fact someone asked Pastor Dan if
he wanted to go to Disney Land with them, but he turned them down to have
that party for Clunk. Clunk tells him that he didn't know that either.
The teacher then tells Clunk that he also knows that Pastor Dan has already
bought the game for Clunky, but is going to give it to him for Christmas.
Clunk says, "Well, why didn't he just tell me?" And the teacher asks, "Would
you want him to ruin the surprise?" Clunk says, "Boy, I guess not." The
teacher then tells Clunk that instead of looking at what he doesn't have,
he needs to stop and look at what he does have and be thankful for them.
Clunk says, "You mean having a friend like Pastor Dan?" and the teacher
says, "Yeah." Clunk tells the teacher that he needs to leave to go find
Pastor Dan and apologize and thank him for all he has done. The teacher
tells him that is a good idea, and Clunky leaves asking the teacher not
to tell Pastor Dan that he knows about the game he got him for Christmas.
The teacher agrees.
Clunky comes up and asks the kids where
Pastor Dan is. (Pastor Dan is the person who does the Clunky puppet.) The
kids should tell him, and then Clunk asks them, "Why is it whenever I come
up, Pastor Dan is always hiding down here?" Clunk shrugs his shoulders
and then calls for Pastor Dan. Pastor Dan begins to tell him not to bug
him when he is busy, but stops and asks him what he wants. Clunk asks Pastor
Dan for the two bucks he owes him for doing the job he asked him to do.
Pastor Dan tells him that he can come and get the money later, and not
to bother him at this time. Clunk tells him he needs the money now. Pastor
Dan comes up and asks him what is so important that he needs to get the
money now. Clunk tells him that he is going to buy teacher A a special
Christmas present and he noticed that there were only a few left at the
store and he wants to make sure he gets one before they run out. Pastor
Dan says OK, and begins to give him the two bucks. Clunky then asks Pastor
Dan if there are any other jobs he could do for the last two bucks he needs.
Pastor Dan tells him that he will give him two more bucks if he would just
leave him alone. Clunk says, "Done" and Pastor Dan gives him four dollars
as Clunk leaves.
Clunk comes back up later in the service
and shows the kids the Christmas present he got teacher A and tells them
that it was the last one in the store and that the store keeper said how
lucky he was to get it. Clunk puts it down and goes back to the back to
get some paper and tape to wrap it. While Clunk is gone, Mr. Sin comes
out and sees the present laying there and asks the kids who it belongs
to. Just then he hears Clunky coming (Clunk is singing) and runs away with
the gift. Clunk comes up singing and carrying the wrapping paper, tape,
ribbon ... etc. and then notices that the gift is gone and drops all of
his stuff and begins to frantically look for it. He then asks the kids
if they know what happened to the gift and they should tell him that Mr.
Sin took it. Clunk asks them which way he went, and then heads out after
him. We then hear Clunk yelling for Mr. Sin to stop and to give him back
his gift. Mr. Sin begins to argue with Clunk about who the gift belongs
to saying finders keepers loser weepers, and Clunk arguing that he didn't
lose it, he just set it down for a minute. Mr. Sin then purposely drops
the gift so that it breaks and Clunk says, "Now look at what you have done."
Mr. Sin threateningly asks him if there is anything he would like to do
about it, and Clunk says, "Ahh, no." Clunk then comes back up on stage,
moping about his broken present. Pastor Dan says, "Psst" as Clunk looks
around and then asks the kids who said that. Pastor Dan says, "Pssst" again,
and again Clunk looks around. Pastor Dan then says, "Clunk, it is me down
here." Clunk looks down and says, "But I am not supposed to talk to you
when you are down there, and besides you gave me two bucks to leave you
alone." Pastor Dan comes up and tells Clunky that it is all right for this
time, and then asks him why he is so sad. Clunk tells Pastor Dan about
what happened, but then stops and says, "Why am I telling you? You are
the one who wrote this skit." Clunk then continues with the story. Pastor
Dan tells him that he will lend him the money to go buy teacher A a new
present. Clunk tells Pastor Dan that it was the last one in the whole town.
Pastor Dan then tells Clunky to go and make her a card. Clunk tells Pastor
Dan that would be stupid, but Pastor Dan tells Clunk that if he makes the
very best card he can and tells her how he feels inside, that it would
be the best present she could get from him. Clunk and Pastor Dan leave
to go find some stuff to make the card.
Teacher A comes up later in the service,
and tells the kids that she and Clunky are supposed to exchange Christmas
presents this morning. She then calls for Clunk, who comes up. Teacher
A asks Clunk how he is doing, and then asks if he is ready to exchange
gifts. Clunk looks down at Pastor Dan and says, "Yeah, I guess so." Teacher
A then gives to Clunky her present. Clunk opens it and begins to thank
her. Clunk then hurriedly tells teacher A what happened with the present
and all, and how he had to make her this card, and with his head hung down,
gives her the card. Teacher A opens the envelope, to find a homemade Christmas
card saying that she is Clunk's favorite person in the whole world, and
a homemade gift certificate stuck inside saying that Clunk owes her one
week's worth of taking out the trash without being asked. Teacher A then
tells Clunk that it is the nicest card she has ever gotten, and that she
is going to take it home and hang it on her wall. Teacher A then gives
him a hug. Clunk is amazed at teacher A's response and asks her how she
could be so happy when she gave him a cool present, and all he had for
her was a stupid card. Teacher A explains to Clunk that she heard about
what had happened, but that the card was from Clunky's heart, and that
is what makes it the best gift of all. Teacher A and Clunk leave to go
play with his present.
NO OTHER GODS BEFORE ME (2:4)
Clunky comes dressed up in black with a
red cape and black pointed hat with stars, and asks you if he can see your
hand. You give it to Clunk who looks at your hand and tells you that you
ate pancakes for breakfast. You tell him he is right, and then ask how
he guessed, and he tells you that he could tell by reading your palmÖ it
had maple syrup on it. You ask him why he is doing all this, and Clunk
tells you that he is getting into this crystal ball, palm reading, astrology,
and Chinese cookie stuff. You tell Clunky that that stuff is dangerous,
but Clunk tells you that he read his horoscope in the "National Intruder"
Thursday, and it came true. You ask him what it said, and Clunk tells you
that it said if he would get out of bed, he would have a good day, he got
out of bed and sure enough, he had a good day. He tells you not only that,
but he opened one of his Chinese cookies this morning, and it told him,
"'You will meet a strange person today.' And look, here you are." (Clunky
laughs.) You tell him that it was just a coincidence, that a lot of things
like that make predictions so vague that your chances are good that it
will happen, so that you will get hooked. Clunk then pulls up a statue
and tells you, "Well how about what happened when I rubbed this statue's
tummy?" You ask what happened, and Clunk tells you that his friend from
school sold him this statue and told him that if he would rub the statue's
tummy and make a wish that it would come true. Clunky bought the statue
for fifty dollars, you interrupt him and ask, "You paid fifty dollars for
this?" and Clunk tells you that it is a magic statue. He continues to tell
you that he made a wish, rubbed its tummy and sure enough his wish came
true. You ask Clunk what he wished for and he tells you that he wished
that he would be tougher and that it has come true. He tells you that Bully
came over to his house yesterday to give him his weekly beating, but instead
of running away from Bully, he stood up to him and beat him up. Again you
tell Clunky that all of that was just a coincidence, and then explain that
even you could have told him that if he would have gotten out of bed he
would have had a good day, and that he would have met someone strange today,
and as for beating up Bully, you saw what happened, and it is not quite
the way he put it. You tell Clunk that you saw as he tried to take a punch
at Bully who ducked his swing, causing Clunky to trip and fall down, pushing
a toy, startling the dog, who scared the cat, who ran by the next door
neighbor who was carrying his groceries, causing him to trip, knocking
over the ladder that had a bucket of water on top which fell and hit Bully
on top of the head. Clunk tells you that you are just a non-believer, and
you tell Clunk that he needs to be careful, because when you do stuff like
that, you are not looking to God for guidance, but to Satan. Clunk just
ignores you and tells you all he knows is that he tried it and it worked.
Clunk tells you that he also called 1-900-psychic, and the lady told him
that if he would sell all of his stuff, and give it to her, that he would
make it lucky and become a millionaire. You tell Clunky that he really
needs to be careful, because people like that are phonies and are in it
to get suckers like him. Clunky says, "So you are calling me a sucker,
huh? Well, I am going to do exactly what she said and become a rich millionaire.
And just to make sure, I am going to rub the statueís tummy for extra good
luck while wearing this rabbit's foot, and then we will see who will be
the sucker." Clunk leaves to go give his money away.
Clunky comes back all sad, and you ask
him how it went. Clunky tells you that he went to the psychic and gave
her all of his money, and then she took the money and slammed the door
in his face, calling him a sucker. You explain to Clunky that when you
do stuff like this, you are putting your trust into something other than
God, and that when you do that, bad is always going to be the end result.
Clunk tells you that he has learned his lesson, that from now on he is
never going to listen to those call-up psychics, and besides, his Chinese
cookie even said yesterday to watch out for phonies. You look and say,
"Clunky!" and he says, "I'm just kidding. The Bible says that you should
have no other gods before him, and from now on, when I want to know something,
I will pray to God." Clunk then leaves.
REAP WHAT YOU SOW (2:8)
Simon comes up looking for Clunky. Clunk
comes up and Simon asks him if he could borrow that new "Candy Land" game
that Clunk just bought. Clunk tells him that it is not his policy to loan
out things to people because thatís how things get broken. Simon tells
him that he loans out things to him all of the time, and Clunk tells him,
"And I am always breaking them too, ainít I?" The more Simon begs, the
madder and ruder Clunky gets. Clunk leaves with Simon following him still
Clunky comes up and Pastor Dan asks him
if he could borrow a stick of gum. Clunk says he doesnít have enough. Pastor
Dan tells Clunky that he knows he has a whole pack, because he just bought
it yesterday. Clunk tells him that if he gives him a stick of gum, then
sometime next week when one of the cute girls comes up to talk to him and
he really needs one, he wonít have it because he gave it to him today.
Pastor Dan also begs, but the more he does, the madder and ruder Clunky
gets. Clunk leaves.
Edword comes up looking for Clunky. He
asks him if he could spare a minute to help him move this heavy box back
behind the stage. Clunk tells him no. Edword tells him that the box is
too heavy for him to lift alone, and that it will only take one minute,
but Clunk tells him that he took a shower this morning for the first time
in a week and a half, and he doesnít want to get all hot and sweaty moving
that old stupid box. Edword begins to beg, and again, the more he begs,
the madder and ruder Clunky gets.
Bully comes up looking for Clunky. Bully
tells him that he is on his way to the ice cream parlor and wants the buck
and a quarter that he loaned Clunky Friday. Clunk tells him that he only
loaned him seventy-five cents. Bully tells him it is twenty-five cents
interest a day. Clunk tells him that he doesnít have it right now, and
Bully tells him that he is hungry for an ice cream cone, and that if he
doesnít get his buck and a quarter from Clunk that he will be forced to
beat him up today, and get a buck fifty from him tomorrow. Clunk tells
him not to sweat, that he will just ask some of his friends if he could
borrow it from them. Clunk then yells for Simon who tells him that he would
if he could, but that he had to use all of his money to buy his own "Candy
Land" game. Bully begins to threaten him, but Clunk tells him not to worry.
Clunk then yells for Edword, who tells him that he only has a five dollar
bill, and doesnít feel like lending it to someone who canít spare a minute.
Clunk then calls for Pastor Dan who also tells him no. Clunk tells him
it is only a buck and a quarter, but Pastor Dan, mocking what Clunk told
him earlier says, "If I give you the buck and a quarter, then sometime
next week, when I need it for something, I wonít have it, cause I gave
it to you today." Clunk begins to panic and Bully gets mad and begins to
chase Clunk around and off the puppet stage to beat him up.